We have been on our fertility journey for a couple of years so have had a lot of time to think about very important details like what the theme for the nursery is going to be! Those that know me (or have read even one post here) would easily predict Star Wars, Star Trek, Buffy or dinosaurs. Or perhaps lesbian witches (NB: don't view that video if you don't want the beautiful story of Willow and Tara spoiled for you) that travel the Alpha Quadrant in a Corellian YT-1300 Light Freighter searching for vampire dinos?
Thankfully, Kay talked me down to Star Wars-only theme! I grew up on Star Wars. I saw Return of the Jedi 4 or 5 times in the first week it aired. (Yes, I was only eight and yes, my brothers and I hid in the bathroom to sneak into successive showings!) I still have many action figures, including a Wicket in its package! Very few people will play Star Wars Trivial Pursuit with me (unless the rules are modified to A. give me only half the words in a question or B. have me answer a whole card to move on). And I even went to see The Phantom Menace four times in the theatre just hoping that it would get better!
The Set-Up
So, a Star Wars theme it is. Thus far, we have:
(We are fully aware that by trying to impress the awesomeness of Star Wars on our child, StormyD is likely to eventually shun it like Bantha poodoo. It is a risk we are willing to take.)
The Set-Up
So, a Star Wars theme it is. Thus far, we have:
- newly painted grey walls (to mimic the outer walls of the Death Star, of course!)
- an R2 light switch plate
- a Wampa rug!
- a stuffed AT-AT
- a self-designed decal that states: I'm a Jedi like my mothers before me
- X-Wing/TIE-Fighter shelf cubes
- and many more to come (suggestions welcome!)
(We are fully aware that by trying to impress the awesomeness of Star Wars on our child, StormyD is likely to eventually shun it like Bantha poodoo. It is a risk we are willing to take.)
The Dilemma
Unfortunately, we have witnessed a few gender-normative reactions to this decision. "What if you have a girl?!" To which we calmly reply, "I'm a girl and I like Star Wars." Unfortunately again, that doesn't actually solve anything for them.
Admittedly, the original Star Wars trilogy isn't overtly feminine. Leia Organa is a very strong character and the original self-rescuing princess (among other scenarios, she was pretty calm and collected when Luke showed up at cell block 1138 and again when the boys showed up to rescue her (on skewers) at the Ewok village), but she lives in a decidedly testacled world. Indeed, most of the Star Wars saga fails the very low-bar of the Bechel Test that asks for films to have at least 2 women that talk about something other than a man (now why Leia and Mon Mothma couldn't have had a single conversation, maybe about a few Bothan spies, is beyond me!). However, I (obviously) don't believe that these things make Star Wars a boy-only domain. Girls can also love and relate to fantastic adventures and coming of age themes! Perhaps you remember the story of Katie the Star Wars Girl, a first-grader who was being bullied for her Star Wars water bottle? She was shown, through astounding solidarity, that girls can be Star Wars fans.
Of course, none of what I am saying here means that girls have to be Star Wars fans or that they can't also love to cook or wear pink, non-sensible shoes! Nor am I trying to vilify or judge those girls or parents who like to live within gender norms. On the contrary, I am merely suggesting that I would like to raise my child in a culture of choices instead of moulds. (Again, those of you who know me will understand that I am a live and let live kinda gal.) If you're interested in a more qualified opinion, 4 year old, Riley (in the video below) will give you a wonderful summary of her lament at the gender codification of toys.
As for my own summary: Gender is a social construct and my hope (nope, it is not A New Hope) is that Kay and I can give StormyD the freedom and confidence to construct her/his own.
The Plan
If we have a girl, she will have access to Star Wars, The Paper-Bag Princess, dolls, balls, trucks, original Lego, an Easy Bake Oven, science, music, pink onesies, blue onesies, black onesies, dresses, jeans, jeggings, her anger, her tears, her patience and her rambunctiousness.
If we have a boy: Exact. Same. List.
As always: please feel free to agree, disagree, empathise, sympathise or be indifferent in the comments!
Unfortunately, we have witnessed a few gender-normative reactions to this decision. "What if you have a girl?!" To which we calmly reply, "I'm a girl and I like Star Wars." Unfortunately again, that doesn't actually solve anything for them.
Admittedly, the original Star Wars trilogy isn't overtly feminine. Leia Organa is a very strong character and the original self-rescuing princess (among other scenarios, she was pretty calm and collected when Luke showed up at cell block 1138 and again when the boys showed up to rescue her (on skewers) at the Ewok village), but she lives in a decidedly testacled world. Indeed, most of the Star Wars saga fails the very low-bar of the Bechel Test that asks for films to have at least 2 women that talk about something other than a man (now why Leia and Mon Mothma couldn't have had a single conversation, maybe about a few Bothan spies, is beyond me!). However, I (obviously) don't believe that these things make Star Wars a boy-only domain. Girls can also love and relate to fantastic adventures and coming of age themes! Perhaps you remember the story of Katie the Star Wars Girl, a first-grader who was being bullied for her Star Wars water bottle? She was shown, through astounding solidarity, that girls can be Star Wars fans.
Of course, none of what I am saying here means that girls have to be Star Wars fans or that they can't also love to cook or wear pink, non-sensible shoes! Nor am I trying to vilify or judge those girls or parents who like to live within gender norms. On the contrary, I am merely suggesting that I would like to raise my child in a culture of choices instead of moulds. (Again, those of you who know me will understand that I am a live and let live kinda gal.) If you're interested in a more qualified opinion, 4 year old, Riley (in the video below) will give you a wonderful summary of her lament at the gender codification of toys.
As for my own summary: Gender is a social construct and my hope (nope, it is not A New Hope) is that Kay and I can give StormyD the freedom and confidence to construct her/his own.
The Plan
If we have a girl, she will have access to Star Wars, The Paper-Bag Princess, dolls, balls, trucks, original Lego, an Easy Bake Oven, science, music, pink onesies, blue onesies, black onesies, dresses, jeans, jeggings, her anger, her tears, her patience and her rambunctiousness.
If we have a boy: Exact. Same. List.
As always: please feel free to agree, disagree, empathise, sympathise or be indifferent in the comments!
...and I’d rather see her lovely
step, her sparkling glance and her face than gaze on
all the troops in Lydia in their chariots and
glittering armour.
~Fragment 16, as translated by Jim Powell
RSS Feed